Author: admin

I hate reading stuff like this. It hurts too damn much.

Now that’s the third time I’ve used that word, concentrating. Concentrating, focusing. You can just as easily consider this lecture to be about concentration as about solitude. Think about what the word means. It means gathering yourself together into a single point rather than letting yourself be dispersed everywhere into a cloud of electronic and social input. It seems to me that Facebook and Twitter and YouTube—and just so you don’t think this is a generational thing, TV and radio and magazines and even newspapers, too—are all ultimately just an elaborate excuse to run away from yourself. To avoid the difficult and troubling questions that being human throws in your way. Am I doing the right thing with my life? Do I believe the things I was taught as a child? What do the words I live by—words like duty, honor, and country—really mean? Am I happy?
via The American Scholar: Solitude and Leadership – William Deresiewicz.

I’ve found myself recently doing things to not seem weird. This is because I’ve been recently going to work early and leaving work late. The leaving work late isn’t a new thing but the going to work early is. I’ve also been moving around the different deployments we have because the different people I need to consult are at different clients.
 
I’ve found myself a little subconscious of late. It seems to be because I’ve not had enough time to scout the surroundings and the people because most of the free time I have I either spend working/studying/skype with the GF.
 
Not wanting to alienate other people I’ve turned into a bland version of me.
 
It’s like I’ve pushed through the lizard brain with respect to work that the lizard brain that concerns the social/visible self has taken hold of that aspect of me.