Bella DePaulo, a Harvard-trained social psychologist who is now a visiting professor at the University of California at Santa Barbara, is America’s foremost thinker and writer on the single experience. In 2005, she coined the word singlism, in an article she published in Psychological Inquiry. Intending a parallel with terms like racism and sexism, DePaulo says singlism is “the stigmatizing of adults who are single [and] includes negative stereotyping of singles and discrimination against singles.” In her 2006 book, Singled Out, she argues that the complexities of modern life, and the fragility of the institution of marriage, have inspired an unprecedented glorification of coupling. (Laura Kipnis, the author of Against Love, has called this “the tyranny of two.”) This marriage myth—“matrimania,” DePaulo calls it—proclaims that the only route to happiness is finding and keeping one all-purpose, all-important partner who can meet our every emotional and social need. Those who don’t have this are pitied. Those who don’t want it are seen as threatening. Singlism, therefore, “serves to maintain cultural beliefs about marriage by derogating those whose lives challenge those beliefs.”
via All the Single Ladies – Magazine – The Atlantic.
QOTD::My spotty anecdotal findings have revealed that, yes, in many cases, the more successful a man is ….::All the Single Ladies – Magazine – The Atlantic
(Granted, given my taste for brainy, creatively ambitious men—or “scrawny nerds,” as a high-school friend describes them—my sample is skewed.) My spotty anecdotal findings have revealed that, yes, in many cases, the more successful a man is (or thinks he is), the less interested he is in commitment.
via All the Single Ladies – Magazine – The Atlantic.
All the Single Ladies – Magazine – The Atlantic
Last summer I called Coontz to talk to her about this revolution. “We are without a doubt in the midst of an extraordinary sea change,” she told me. “The transformation is momentous—immensely liberating and immensely scary. When it comes to what people actually want and expect from marriage and relationships, and how they organize their sexual and romantic lives, all the old ways have broken down.”
For starters, we keep putting marriage off. In 1960, the median age of first marriage in the U.S. was 23 for men and 20 for women; today it is 28 and 26. Today, a smaller proportion of American women in their early 30s are married than at any other point since the 1950s, if not earlier. We’re also marrying less—with a significant degree of change taking place in just the past decade and a half. In 1997, 29 percent of my Gen X cohort was married; among today’s Millennials that figure has dropped to 22 percent. (Compare that with 1960, when more than half of those ages 18 to 29 had already tied the knot.) These numbers reflect major attitudinal shifts. According to the Pew Research Center, a full 44 percent of Millennials and 43 percent of Gen Xers think that marriage is becoming obsolete.
via All the Single Ladies – Magazine – The Atlantic.
Engineers Rule :: Tal Golesworthy: How I repaired my own heart
Inspiring VOD:: PdF 2011 | Jim Gilliam: The Internet is My Religion
Love watching this video!!!
Better Government:: Apparently We Dont Have An Ambassador for China:: 2012 04 16
I don’t know who is actually not doing their job here, the Commission on Appointments or the Executive who are not giving unassailable names for the post.
We live in a world that is fast changing. The power lines are being drawn and a small nation such as are can and should play the diplomacy game. We don’t have the firepower or the economic muscle to play any other. We need competence in governance NOW!!
Inspriring::About | Caines Arcade About | A cardboard arcade made by a 9-year old boy.
Watch the short film at the link
About Caine’s ArcadeCaine’s Arcade is a short film about a 9 year old boy’s cardboard arcade, located in his dad’s used auto parts store in East LA.Backstory Caine Monroy is a 9-year old boy who spent his summer vacation building an elaborate DIY cardboard arcade in his dad’s used auto parts store.Caine dreamed of the day he would have lots of customers visit his arcade, and he spent months preparing everything, perfecting the game design, making displays for the prizes, designing elaborate security systems, and hand labeling paper-lunch-gift-bags. However, his dad’s autoparts store located in an industrial part of East LA gets almost zero foot traffic, so Caine’s chances of getting a customer were very small, and the few walk in customers that came through were always in too much of a hurry to get their auto part to play Caine’s Arcade. But Caine never gave up.One day, by chance, I walked into Smart Parts Auto looking for a used door handle for my ’96 Corolla. What I found was an elaborate handmade cardboard arcade manned by a young boy who asked if I would like to play. I asked Caine how it worked and he told me that for $1 I could get two turns, or for $2 I could get a Fun Pass with 500 turns. I got the Fun Pass.…………………..This short film tells the story of Caine’s Arcade, and of our attempt to make Caine’s day.A roughcut of the film premiered at DIY Days, where Caine set up his arcade for people to play. Caine was commissioned by an attendee to build a custom cardboard claw machine, which he did for $80.This film is a collaboration between all of my friends who chipped in, as well as all of the folks online who got behind the idea of helping to make Caine’s day. Big THANKS to everyone who helped! See FILM CREDITSAfter the flashmob, at the end of the day as Caine and his dad drove home, Caine turned to his dad and said, “Dad, this was the best day of my whole life.”…………………. If you like the film, please share it with a friend, and leave Caine a message on his Facebook page. If you are in the LA area, come on down and play Caine’s Arcade hours/directions – Caine loves customers!Caine’s Scholarship FundWe are also attempting to raise a $100,000 scholarship fund for Caine to help him go to college. If you would like to chip in, please donate by clicking the button in the side bar. Firefox or Safari browsers recommended; Paypal does not work with Chrome.………………….And if you have any questions, feel free to hit me up on the twitter: @nirvan Thanks!
via About | Caines Arcade About | A cardboard arcade made by a 9-year old boy..
rePost::Seth's Blog: Is everyone entitled to their opinion?
I see an epidemic of bloggers who believe they have to have their take.
Yes It’s your right but it is also others rights to filter you out.
When some people say my belief in that is this. That doesn’t automatically mean they have the right to be factored in the conversation. If you don’t matter being the loudest screamer can’t get you anywhere. You are nothing.
The good thing is there is an out to this shithole. Be someone who matters. Create a body of work that in the words of Steve Martin “Be so good they can’t ignore you.” (Aside: Where in the world is my copy of Steve Martin’s Born Standing Up?).
If you matter then people will listen. I’m all fed up with the famous for being famous celebrity. Fuck That Shit.
Is everyone entitled to their opinion?
Perhaps, but that doesn’t mean we need to pay the slightest bit of attention.
There are two things that disqualify someone from being listened to:
1. Lack of Standing. If you are not a customer, a stakeholder or someone with significant leverage in spreading the word, we will ignore you. And we should.
When you walk up to an artist and tell her you don’t like her painting style, you should probably be ignored. If you’ve never purchased expensive original art, don’t own a gallery and don’t write an influential column in ArtNews, then by all means, you must be ignored.
If you’re working in Accounts Payable and you hate the company’s new logo, the people who created it should and must ignore your opinion. It just doesn’t matter to anyone but you.
I’m being deliberately harsh here for a reason. If we’re going to do great work, it means that some people aren’t going to like it. And if the people who don’t like it don’t have an impact on what happens to the work after it’s complete, the only recourse of someone doing great work is to ignore their opinion.
2. No Credibility. An opinion needs to be based on experience and expertise. I know you don’t like cilantro, but whether or not you like it is not extensible to the population at large. On the other hand, if you have a track record of matching the taste sensibility of my target market, then I very much want to hear what you think.
People with a history of bad judgment, people who are quick to jump to conclusions or believe in unicorns or who have limited experience in the market–these people are entitled to opinions, but it’s not clear that the creator of the work needs to hear them. They’ve disqualified themselves because the method they use for forming opinions about how the market will respond is suspect. The scientific method works, and if you’re willing to suspend it at will and just go with your angry gut, we don’t need to hear from you.
via Seth’s Blog: Is everyone entitled to their opinion?.
For language lawyers::Letters of Note: C. S. Lewis on Writing
About amn’t I, aren’t I and am I not, of course there are no right or wrong answers about language in the sense in which there are right and wrong answers in Arithmetic. “Good English” is whatever educated people talk; so that what is good in one place or time would not be so in another. Amn’t I was good 50 years ago in the North of Ireland where I was brought up, but bad in Southern England. Aren’t I would have been hideously bad in Ireland but very good in England. And of course I just don’t know which (if either) is good in modern Florida. Don’t take any notice of teachers and textbooks in such matters. Nor of logic. It is good to say “more than one passenger was hurt,” although more than one equals at least two and therefore logically the verb ought to be plural were not singular was!
What really matters is:–
1. Always try to use the language so as to make quite clear what you mean and make sure your sentence couldn’t mean anything else.
2. Always prefer the plain direct word to the long, vague one. Don’t implement promises, but keep them.
3. Never use abstract nouns when concrete ones will do. If you mean “More people died” don’t say “Mortality rose.”
4. In writing. Don’t use adjectives which merely tell us how you want us to feel about the thing you are describing. I mean, instead of telling us a thing was “terrible,” describe it so that we’ll be terrified. Don’t say it was “delightful”; make us say “delightful” when we’ve read the description. You see, all those words (horrifying, wonderful, hideous, exquisite) are only like saying to your readers, “Please will you do my job for me.”
5. Don’t use words too big for the subject. Don’t say “infinitely” when you mean “very”; otherwise you’ll have no word left when you want to talk about something really infinite.
Thanks for the photos. You and Aslan both look v. well. I hope you’ll like your new home.
With love
yours
C.S. Lewis
via Letters of Note: C. S. Lewis on Writing.
Goon a Great Fuckin Movie::Ain't It Cool News: The best in movie, TV, DVD, and comic book news.
There are movies out there that I call, in the parlance of TRUE ROMANCE’s Clarence Worley, “Great Fuckin’ Movies.” DIE HARD’s a GFM. So’s RIO BRAVO. So’s HEAT, and ROCKY, and PREDATOR, and Carpenter’s THE THING, and so on. They aren’t necessarily awards winners, but when you’re done, you sit back, with a satisfied sigh, itch firmly scratched, and say to no one in particular, “That was a Great Fuckin’ Movie.” Well, GOON is a Great Fuckin’ Movie. It delivers on every level – humor, emotion, action, and terrific acting from none other than Seann William Scott, who has just made the performance of his career so far. And I’m not even a hockey fan.
via Ain’t It Cool News: The best in movie, TV, DVD, and comic book news..